cxvi

“Knowing is not enough…you must apply. Willing is not enough…you must do.”

-Bruce Lee

            Today I am tired. Weird.

            It’s weird because, normally, I am bounded with energy, staying up until the tiniest cracks of dawn. Normally I find myself spastically dancing with my reflection, barefoot on cold linoleum tile floors. Normally my contacts dry from my eyes being awake for so long, soaking in all that is around me and barely blinking from the vigorousness of the day.

            And so, with the first day of a strict new course schedule, of me racing across the campus, avoiding puddles and stares, of me never having laughed so hard or felt so tired, almost officially under my belt, my energy has disappeared. When I threw my blue-jeaned self onto my familiar narrow bed an hour ago, I wasn’t expecting to not be able to have gotten up since. But inactivity has its merits; my fingers have been hitting the wearing letters of my laptop’s keyboard with increasing speed and a list of WILLSANDWONTS appearing on my monitor, to start off the new school year right. So:

            What I will do this semester:

I will study. Sometimes.

I will go to bed earlier.

I will actually exercise.

I will memorize the entirety of the “Forever” rap.

I will organize my iTunes Library.

I will actually pay attention in (most of) my classes.

I will finish the books I have started.

            What I won’t do this semester:

I won’t cry anymore while I read George W. Bush’s memoirs.

I won’t wear any clothes, as is appropriate.

I won’t swear.

I won’t forget my headphones in other people’s cars.

I won’t download discographies of one-hit-wonder bands.

I won’t write haikus.

I won’t pretend I understand football.

            But for tonight, there will be no more running or dancing, my contacts in their chemical case. So there is now time to sleep.

            I will.